Life is a Balancing Act

In case you are wondering... I can't do it all! I know, unfortunately I'm just as surprised as you are. I work, I am at home with my kids, I'm part of a leadership position in my church, my father-in-law is going through chemo (which is absolute hell...in case you've never been through it), and today I got chastised by some hypocrite.

I can't do it anymore.

And you know what's even more pathetic, 80% of my pain is me! I place such high expectations on myself. Then I end up feeling guilty for not meeting all of those expectations.

Where do these expectations come from, and why am I so loyal to them?

I ran a 5k yesterday and finished at 29 minutes. My goal was 30minutes!
Five minutes after the race, when I got done breathing for dear life, and the feeling in my legs began to come back, I turned to my hubby and said, "I'm so proud. Next year my goal is 21 minutes."

Where did I get the number 21 minutes? I have no clue. I just make up these ideas and think, "Yeah, that's good. That's the new rule."

If someone else would have said, "Good job, next time make it 21 minutes."

I would have rubbed their face in my sweaty arm pit and thought, "Moron."

But somehow, I say it to myself and think, "Wow! Great idea!"

I have a lot to learn....