Women, lets face it. We are known for providing a sense of community. Making everyone feel good. But in the end, we're bossy. We just have a way of making it sound "nice." Here is a classic example from my relationship:
I call it the "WE" means "YOU" theory. For instance:
We are driving--oh wait--there I go again with the "WE" thing. He is driving, I'm just a passenger (but somehow, that doesn't stop me). WE keep driving and we can't find the stupid restaurant.
I start out really nice. "Honey, don't you think WE should pull over and ask for directions?"
"No, I think I can find it," he says.
Okay. All is going well. We are happy.
"Yeah, but I mean it seems like WE don't know where we're going," I say, still in my nice, yet slightly annoyed voice.
"No, I think I know where it is." He's still calm.
"Well, WE are getting kinda car sick driving in circles here..."
"No, I feel fine, actually."
"No! WE are getting sick."
Don't relate? Here's another one.
This is a great classic in our marriage:
We (and I actually do mean both of us) HATE laundry. With a passion. I could blog about our hate of laundry to the point that both of us end up naked before we are willing to do the wash. Scary. But the worst part, we HATE to fold it, put it away, look at it...etc. I've tried techniques to help me be grateful, such as telling myself good quotes like, "Having laundry means you have clothes."
It doesn't work. It should, but it doesn't.
So laundry...long day, need to shower, all the clean clothes are in the basement.
I turn to my hubby. "WE should really fold the laundry."
"Yes 'WE' should," he says.
We both sit there.
Oh well, nice thought.
"Maybe WE should get off our butt, since I've been working all day," I hint.
"Yeah, maybe WE should, since I've been working all day too," he hints back.
Dang he's good.
This isn't going well. It never does.
Finally I just say it.
"YOU should fold the laundry. YOU should pull over and ask for directions, YOU should..."
"ME? You think I should do all of that?"
"Of course! That's what I've been saying this whole time!"
"You said, 'WE.' "
"Honey, come on. WE means YOU."
Well at least we're clear now. Until tomorrow, when he forgets, and WE have to start all over again.